How do your thoughts imprison you? How can you escape? Listen to this podcast for answers.
Transcript
Hey there, fellow deep divers. Welcome to our deep dive into Don’t Believe Everything You Think.
I think we’re all constantly bombarded with messages about positive thinking and self-improvement. But this book, it offers a totally different perspective. It’s not about adding more to our to-do lists. It’s about clearing out all the mental clutter that’s preventing us from experiencing true peace and joy.
I think a lot of listeners, you might be seeking a shortcut to the wisdom in this book, and you’ve come to the right place.
So what’s the big idea here? What’s the core message?
So the book really digs into this idea that while pain is unavoidable, like we all experience pain in life, suffering the heavy emotional weight we carry, that’s optional.
OK. I’m intrigued, but also a little skeptical.
How is suffering optional?
The book argues that we create our own suffering through our thinking.
Whoa. Hold on a second.
Are you saying that all the bad stuff that happens to us, that’s just in our heads?
No, not exactly.
It’s more about how we react to those events.
How our thinking shapes our experience of reality.
Think about it. Two people could be in the same exact situation, but their thoughts about it create completely different realities for each of them.
Yeah, that makes sense.
I can definitely see how my own thoughts can sometimes make things way worse than they actually are.
But are you telling me that thinking is the root of all our problems?
That’s exactly what the book suggests.
And Nguyan backs it up with some powerful examples.
He uses this analogy of a coffee shop.
Two people are sitting there, same coffee, same atmosphere, but one is having a total meltdown, while the other is completely chilled out.
Oh, I’ve definitely been both of those people on the same day.
Oh, my gosh.
So you’re saying it’s not the coffee. It’s not the coffee. Or the crowds. It’s their thoughts about it.
Precisely. It highlights how we each live in our own world of thoughts, not an actual reality.
Yeah. OK. That’s making me think about all the times I’ve totally overreacted to things, just because of what I was thinking.
But if thinking is the problem,
how do we just stop doing it?
That’s the big question. And that’s where the book starts to get really interesting.
It’s not about completely eliminating thoughts. It’s more about recognizing the difference between thoughts and thinking.
Wait, isn’t that the same thing?
Not quite.
This is a crucial distinction that the book makes. Think of it like this. Thoughts are like ingredients. They just pop up their neutral flour, sugar, eggs on their own. Not a big deal. But thinking is what we do with those ingredients. That’s where the suffering comes in. It’s the stories we create, the judgments we make, the endless analysis that sends us down a rabbit hole of negativity.
OK. So it’s not about getting rid of thoughts altogether. It’s about changing how we relate to them.
Exactly. It’s about learning to witness our thoughts without getting tangled up in them.
I like that.
Witnessing our thoughts.
It’s like being an observer rather than our participant in the mental drama.
I’m definitely guilty of starring in my own mental soap operas. We all– if we’re not supposed to overthink everything, how do we make decisions or set goals?
I mean, I’m a pretty ambitious person, so this whole non-thinking thing kind of freaks me out.
I hear you. I’m the same way. The book dives into this in a fascinating way. It’s not about becoming passive or giving up on your dreams. It’s about aligning your actions with your true self with what Ngoi-en calls universal mind.
Universal mind.
Yeah.
That sounds pretty deep. Can you break that down for me a little bit?
Yeah, think of it like this.
Have you ever had a moment where an amazing idea just pops into your head seemingly out of nowhere? Oh, yeah. Or that feeling of being deeply connected to everything around you?
Mm-hmm.
That’s universal mind at work. That’s that source that we’re talking about. Yeah. The book is about learning to tap into that source more consistently.
OK.
And when we do, that’s when the magic happens.
OK. I’m starting to see how this could be powerful.
Yeah.
But how does universal mind connect to goals and decision making?
I’m all for connecting with a higher power.
Sure.
But I still need to pay my bills and figure out what to have for dinner.
You will. That’s the beauty of it. OK. The book distinguishes between two types of goals. Goals fueled by inspiration.
OK.
And goals fueled by desperation.
OK.
Which do you think feels better?
Inspiration definitely sounds more fun than desperation. Mm-hmm. But what’s the difference, really?
Well, desperation is like that feeling of, I need this to be happy. It comes from a place of lack– like, you’re trying to fill a void. It creates this constant striving that never feels satisfying.
I’ve been there. It’s like running out of treadmill.
Yeah.
You’re working hard, but not really getting anywhere.
Exactly. But goals that come from inspiration are different. It’s like you’re already whole. And you’re just expressing your natural creativity and joy in the world.
So it’s about doing things because we want to.
Yeah.
Not because we feel like we have to.
That’s the heart of it. And you know what’s really cool? What? The book suggests that inspired action actually leads to greater success and fulfillment than chasing goals from a place of desperation.
OK. That makes sense.
Yeah.
But how do we know which goals are coming from inspiration and which are coming from desperation? I mean, sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference.
Yeah. It’s a great question.
Yeah.
It’s about tuning into your feelings.
OK.
Does the thought of pursuing this goal feel expansive and joyful?
OK.
Or does it feel heavy and stressful? Yeah. Your feelings are your guide.
So it’s all about listening to our gut, trusting our intuition.
That’s a big part of it. But you know what? I think we need to dive deeper into that in the next part of our deep dive.
Ugh. You’re killing me with a cliffhanger.
But all right. I guess I can wait.
Our listeners are probably ready for a little break anyway. We’ve covered a lot of ground already.
Yeah, we have.
But don’t worry. We’ll be back soon with more juicy insights from Don’t Believe Everything You Think.
Looking forward to it.
OK, so we talked about how our thinking can create suffering.
Right.
And how connecting the universal mind can lead to inspired action. But how does all of this actually work in real life?
Yeah.
Like, how do we stop those negative thought spirals and start trusting our intuition?
The book offers some practical tools for doing just that.
OK. I’m all ears. Give me the tools.
One of the most powerful practices is simply becoming aware of your thoughts.
You know, I feel like we’ve been circling back to awareness a lot.
It’s that fundamental– it’s like shining a light on those mental shadows, you know, those thought patterns that are causing you stress anxiety or just general unhappiness.
So it’s about noticing when those negative thoughts pop up without getting swept away by them.
Exactly. When you start paying attention to your thoughts, you realize that they’re not facts.
Right.
They’re just mental events. They come and go like clouds in the sky.
OK. I can see how they would be helpful.
Yeah.
But what about those really sticky thoughts, the ones that just won’t let go?
That’s where the second tool comes in–surrender.
Surrender, like waving the white flag to my negative thoughts.
Yeah.
Not sure. I like the sound of that.
It’s not about giving up or letting those thoughts control you.
OK.
It’s more about letting go of the need to figure everything out with your limited thinking.
So instead of trying to force a solution, we surrender to.
To a higher power, to universal mind, to whatever you call that source of wisdom and guidance that’s bigger than our individual minds.
OK. That makes more sense. It’s like admitting that we don’t have all the answers and trusting that something bigger does.
Precisely. And when we surrender, something amazing happens. We create space for intuition to emerge.
That’s where the intuitive GPS comes in.
Exactly. Intuition is that inner knowing, that gut feeling that often guides us in the right direction. Even when it doesn’t make logical sense.
OK. I’m starting to get this, but I’m also a little skeptical. Sure. Can we really trust our intuition for everything? What about those big life decisions, like choosing a career or a partner?
Those are exactly the times when intuition can be most valuable.
Really?
Yeah.
But how do we know if we’re really hearing our intuition or just our fears and desires disguised as intuition?
It’s a great question. And one that many people struggle with. One way to distinguish between fear-based thinking and true intuition is to pay attention to how it feels in your body.
OK. This is getting interesting. So we’re not just talking about a mental process. It’s also about physical sensations.
Absolutely. Fear tends to feel constricted tight, maybe even a little nauseous.
Yes. I know that feeling all too well.
But intuition feels more expansive, open, and often accompanied by a sense of peace or excitement.
So it’s like that aha moment where everything just clicks into place.
Exactly. And the more you practice tuning into your intuition, the easier it becomes to distinguish it from those fear-based thoughts.
OK. I’m starting to see the light.
Good.
But I have to admit, this whole process sounds a lot easier said than done.
You’re absolutely right.
Yeah.
It takes practice patience and a willingness to let go of old patterns. Right. But the rewards are immeasurable.
OK. You’ve convinced me. I’m ready to give this a try.
Awesome.
But before we wrap up, I want to go back to something we touched on earlier–unconditional creation.
Yeah.
I love that idea of creating for the pure joy of it without any attachment to the outcome.
It’s a beautiful concept, isn’t it?
It is. But I struggle with that.
Yeah.
I’m so used to creating with a goal in mind. Sure. Whether it’s getting a promotion or getting likes on social media. Right. How do we shift from that conditional way of creating to a more unconditional approach?
It starts with recognizing that you are already a creator. OK. Every thought you have, every action you take, is an act of creation.
Whoa. That’s kind of mind blowing. So even when I’m just scrolling through Instagram, I’m creating my reality.
In a way, yes. You’re choosing what to focus on, what to give your energy to. And those choices shape your experience.
OK. That’s making me rethink my social media habits.
Maybe so.
So how do we start creating more consciously, more unconditionally?
The book suggests that it begins with connecting to that feeling of pure joy.
OK.
What activities bring you joy, regardless of the outcome?
That’s a good question.
Yeah.
I love to write. I love to dance. I love to spend time in nature.
Those are great examples. What would it look like to engage in those activities from a place of pure joy without any expectations or attachments?
I think it would feel really freeing. I could just let go and be myself without worrying about being good enough for impressing anyone.
That’s the essence of unconditional creation. It’s about tapping into that innate creative energy that flows through all of us.
I love that. We’re all artists in our own way just expressing ourselves in the world.
Absolutely.
But you know what? I’m realizing that even when we’re creating from a place of joy, there are still going to be challenges and obstacles.
How do we navigate those difficult moments without falling back into those old patterns of overthinking and self-doubt?
That’s where the three-step process we talked about earlier comes in.
Oh, right. The awareness, surrender, and presence thing.
Exactly.
But you know what? I think we need to save that juicy reveal–
OK.
For the final part of our deep dive.
Sounds good.
Give our listeners a little something to look forward to.
Yeah.
All right. We’re back. And I am so ready to hear about this three-step process for navigating challenges.
You asked for it. Remember we were talking about awareness, surrender, and presence?
Yeah.
And how they’re key to connecting with your intuition and creating from a place of joy?
Right.
This process can be applied to pretty much any challenge you face.
OK, that’s exciting. It sounds like a universal antidote to suffering.
You could say that. So step one is awareness.
Awareness again. I’m sensing a theme here.
It’s the foundation of everything. When you’re facing a challenge, whether it’s a creative block or a relationship issue or even just a plain old bad day, the first step is to become aware of what’s happening in your mind. What are the thoughts creating those feelings of stress, anxiety, overwhelm?
So it’s about shining a light on those mental gremlins before they take over the whole party.
Exactly. And once you’ve identified those thoughts, the next step is surrender.
OK. Surrender time.
I’m starting to get more comfortable with this idea of letting go, but a part of me still wants to grab onto those thoughts and wrestle them into submission.
I hear you. Our minds are wired to solve problems. And that often leads to overthinking. But surrender is about recognizing that sometimes the best way to solve a problem is to, well, stop trying so hard.
So it’s about trusting that there’s a wiser part of ourselves that can handle things, even when our conscious minds are freaking out.
Exactly. It’s like saying to the universe, OK, I’m open to a solution that’s better than anything I can come up with on my own.
Ooh. That takes a lot of faith, though, doesn’t it?
It does. And that’s where presence comes in.
All right. Bring on the presence. What does that look like, like in practice?
Presence is about allowing yourself to fully experience the feelings that are present in this moment, like without judgment or resistance.
Wait. So you’re saying I shouldn’t try to push away those uncomfortable feelings. That seems counterintuitive.
I know it sounds strange.
Yeah.
But when we resist our emotions, they tend to intensify.
It’s like trying to hold a beach ball underwater. The more you push it down, the more it wants to pop back up.
OK. I can relate to that. So instead of fighting those feelings, we’re supposed to just let them be.
Exactly. And you know what happens when you do that?
What happens? Do they magically disappear?
They often do. Or at least they lose their power over you. When you create space for those emotions to flow through you, they naturally begin to dissipate.
So it’s like we’re creating a safe space for those feelings to express themselves. And then they’re free to move on.
That’s a beautiful way to put it. And as those negative emotions release their grip, guess what emerges?
Our intuition, our inner wisdom.
Exactly. It’s like clearing the static so you can finally tune into that clear signal that’s always been there.
I love that analogy. So it’s awareness, surrender, and then presence to allow that intuitive guidance to come through.
You got it. And the more you practice this three-step process, the easier it becomes.
It sounds like it takes a lot of practice and patience.
It does.
But I have to say, this whole conversation has been so incredibly inspiring. I’m starting to see how much power we actually have over our own experience.
That’s the key takeaway from don’t believe everything you think. We are not victims of our circumstances or our thoughts. We have the power to choose peace, joy, and freedom in every moment.
Well said. And on that note, I think this is a perfect place to wrap up our deep dive into don’t believe everything you think. Thank you so much for sharing all of your wisdom and insights with us today.
It’s been a pleasure being here. Thanks for having me.
And to all of our amazing listeners out there, remember, you are not your thoughts. You are the awareness that witnesses those thoughts. And from that place of awareness, anything is possible. So keep diving deep. Keep questioning. Keep exploring. Most importantly, keep creating from a place of joy. Until next time, happy non-thinking.
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